Are you a kind person wanting to change the world? Or do you want to be a kind person changing the world?
If so, you’re going to need good healthy boundaries. And that’s easier said than done.
If you are kind, traditional advice about boundaries has likely failed you. It doesn’t work because it doesn’t feel right and it often doesn’t fit well. It doesn’t feel like an extension of you or your kindness. And the nutshell version of boundaries being only and just about how to say “no”? Not even close!
Many of you who have been following me for a while know that for years now I’ve been encouraging everyone I know to follow Randi Buckley and her work on Healthy Boundaries for Kind People. And now I’m back, saying it again — people, this is life-changing work and has significantly impacted my relationships with others, my working style, and my overall happiness.
This year, Randi is opening the course to people of all genders, so men or those who’ve previously held back because they thought it wouldn’t be for them, please think about whether this could help you in your life. She is also offering her course “Healthy Boundaries for Business” as a freebie for those who enrol in the general 12-week program of calls and online resources for Healthy Boundaries for Kind People. And all pay-in-fullprre-Sale registrations include a bonus private coaching session with Randi – from my experience, that’s worth it on its own!
And, if there is enough interest, *I’ll be coordinating a free small sub-group to work through some sessions on “Healthy Boundaries for Human Rights Defenders and Social Justice Advocates”*, because I think healthy boundaries are so essential and misused in this kind of work, and I’ve been loving using the healthy boundaries framework in coaching individual clients in these professions. Finally, for anyone signing up through me, I’m also offering a free private coaching session with me (I’m a Certified Healthy Boundaries for Kind People Coach).
The course starts next week, 24 January, but it will start slow and gentle, so if you miss the first week, nbd, but enrolment will close at the end of the month. Find out more here and below.
If you want to see a preview of what it will be like, Randi has been offering a series of Boundary Broadcasts as warm-up for those already enrolled.
So, more info for those who want to know more … What is this Healthy Boundaries thing all about?
Well, without boundaries, people tend to feel unworthy, frustrated, used, and disrespected. But it doesn’t have to be that way. While boundaries will never be a cakewalk, Randi teaches folks to have them in ways that honour who they are and have them be super-duper effective. We look at the root causes of weak boundaries and rebuild from there. As Healthy Boundary coaches, we don’t tell people what to do, we teach new ways of thinking and forge tools to navigate their own, and ever-changing boundaries. It’s custom, skilled, and nuanced work. It changes lives.
Here’s how Randi explains this course:
Healthy Boundaries for Kind People (HBfKP) is for folks who have been challenged with either too soft or too rigid boundaries. It’s not up to me to define the “too” part, we’ll know when our boundaries are healthy as they will feel just right. Healthy Boundaries give us the infrastructure (and a container) for who we want to be in the world and how we want to live. They are how we know where we stop and another begins; what’s ours to carry and what is for someone else. Healthy Boundaries are our values in action. This is important because we’re in relationship to everything (even ideas, the past, the future, the living, and the deceased) and what determines those relationships are boundaries. Healthy boundaries are the infrastructure of everything, whether you have them or not. The quality of your boundaries is the quality of your life.
Boundaries are a container for kindness and an act of compassion. They say both “not like this” and “I think we’re both worth more”. Parents who don’t model healthy boundaries raise children who don’t respect boundaries. A relationship that doesn’t honor boundaries cannot honor respect. They are like an instruction manual for folks to get the best version of you. They are everything.
For those who may have had a peek in previous years and considered doing this program, it may help to know that the content and curriculum are refreshed and expanded. Randi is doing even more with the pathology of weak boundaries and doing more work with “People Pleasing”. Of course, communicating boundaries is often where folks get tripped up- they don’t know what to say, or say it in a way that makes it all backfire. So those remain important pieces as does her Metaphor Methodology, which gives folks new frameworks for healthy boundaries.
I am promoting this course as an affiliate, but not because I get a small kickback for doing so, rather because I truly believe in the power of this work. For those who don’t like affiliate sales, you can buy directly from Randi, and for those who would like to do the program but who have severe financial constraints, let me know and if we agree I may be able to contribute to your enrolment fee, thus enabling you to benefit from a discount. Randi also offers a couple of different payment plans. Here’s where you can enrol: http://bit.ly/HB4KP2018